When you’re learning Japanese, one of the most important skills to develop is how to make requests politely. Depending on who you’re talking to—your friend, your teacher, or a stranger—you’ll want to choose the right level of politeness. In this post, let’s walk through different ways to ask someone to do something for you, from casual to very polite.

Level 1: 〜て

Super casual.
Used with close friends or family.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + [nothing]

Examples:
ドアを開あけて。
“Open the door.”

これ見みて。
“Look at this.”

Level 2: 〜てくれない？

Casual but softer.
Still friendly, but more like a question.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + くれない？

Examples:
ドアを開あけてくれない？
“Can you open the door (for me)?”

手伝てつだってくれない？
“Can you help me?”

Level 3: 〜てくれませんか？

Polite.
Used in daily polite conversations.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + くれませんか？

Examples:
ドアを開あけてくれませんか？
“Would you open the door for me?”

写真しゃしんを撮とってくれませんか？
“Could you take a photo (for me)?”

Level 4: 〜てもらえませんか？

Polite with a slight nuance change.
Focuses on the benefit to you.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + もらえませんか？

Examples:
ドアを開あけてもらえませんか？
“Would you mind opening the door for me?”

駅えきまで案内あんないしてもらえませんか？
“Could you show me the way to the station?”

Level 5: 〜てくださいませんか？

Very polite and humble.
Often used in customer service or when speaking to someone of higher status.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + くださいませんか？

Examples:
ドアを開あけてくださいませんか？
“Would you be so kind as to open the door?”

メニューを見みせてくださいませんか？
“Would you please show me the menu?”

Level 6: 〜ていただけませんか？

The most polite and respectful.
Shows high respect and humility.

Structure: Verb (て-form) + いただけませんか？

Examples:
ドアを開あけていただけませんか？
“Could I kindly ask you to open the door?”

資料しりょうを送おくっていただけませんか？
“Would you kindly send me the documents?”

Summary Table

Pro Tip:

In general, the longer the expression, the more polite it is. So when in doubt, go with a longer one like
〜ていただけませんか？ to stay safe and respectful.

If you want to learn Japanese, improve your skills, or connect with native speakers and other learners, we can help. We offer one-on-one lessons, a supportive community, and on demand courses.

Website: nihongonana.com
Email: support@nihongonana.com

Book 1-on-1 lessons: https://nihongonana.com/lessons/
Join our Speaking Club: https://nihongonana.com/community/
Join our Course Waitlist: https://nihongonana.com/courses/